I found this on my hard drive from 2 years ago. I need to be more comfortable with sharing these things.
Recently, I’ve handed in my resignation at my job.
Nothing bad. I enjoyed my job and the people are great. It’s just time to move on, my heart knows this but my head is worried about the jump to follow.
I’m on the diving board and I know I’ll jump but will I enjoy the fall?
I’ve worked jobs before, I’ve been on and off jobs ever since I worked as a paper boy.
After this was I was a Retail Assistant at a video game shop.
I’ve worked as a TV & Film runner.
I’ve even worked as an events team member for a marathon.
Yet, this was my first “job”. My first ever job in which people think it’s a “real job.” I could work there for 10 years and nobody would say:
“So when are you gunna get a real job”.
So, when I said was quitting, a few people thought I was insane. I understand their worry, but I knew when I joined I would be leaving at some point, no matter my financial situation. (psst… it’s okay right now…)
I’m leaving so I can enjoy my twenties, my twenties are a time for mistakes and to find out who I am and I don’t want to find myself behind a desk when I’m older thinking of what I could’ve done. I’m okay with making mistakes and only thinking up until my next payday and not the next year.
I want to be free to see my friends and not settle down for a while. I have no interest in kids, or relationships, or mortgages.
I’m full of anxiety and stress and worry and only had one panic attack so far so compared to when I moved to university my mental health is much better than I thought it would be.
It’s time to get my own space, make my own mistakes, enjoy life as much as I can and go back to living on Rice and Tomato Sauce until I get paid next. I’ve spent the last 6 months getting out of debt and getting a better credit score after my stupidity in University. I’ve made up for it and it’s time to reap my reward.